Colm facing off with a swan

C: So this duck walks into a bar one day...
S: waddles...
C: what?
S: ducks don't walk they waddle, look at him over there...see what I mean?
C: whatever...who's joke is this anyway?
S: I'm just sayin...
C: like I said, the duck goes in and says to the bartender, "You got any grapes?"
S: sounds like a duck
C: and the bartender says, " no, I don't have any grapes and beat it. No ducks allowed."
S: sounds reasonable
C: five minutes later in comes the duck again and he walks...waddles up to the bartender and he says, "Got any grapes?"
S: I know this duck, I think..
C: the bartender looks at the duck and he says, "Beat it duck and if I see you again, I'll nail your webbed feet to the floor."
S: Harsh
C: so five minutes later in comes the duck again and he goes right up to the bar and he says, "You got any nails?" The bartender says, "No." So the duck looks at him straight in the eye and says, "You got any grapes?"
S: (sound of honking) Duck jokes are the best...!

K